


Ex Scrinio Dili

by DryCereal



Series: "Week of Fics" Challenge, July 2018 [3]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: A letter from Dil, He has OPINIONS, Human-Sim Relationships, Humour, Lacks free will though..., Multi, Platonic Relationships., The Sims 4, This isn't that kind of fic.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2019-06-11 23:35:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15326880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DryCereal/pseuds/DryCereal
Summary: Dil has a few things he'd like to get off his chest...





	1. Chapter 1

Dan, Phil;  
  
Well… firstly, I’m not calling either of you “Dad.” ‘Cos you’re not. You don’t treat me like a son, I’m not referring to you as my fathers. I’m definitely not calling either of you “Daddy.” I’m still traumatized from hearing that word echoing round my home when you THOUGHT you’d paused time. (Cheers for that, by the way. I’d wondered what people meant by “noisy neighbours,” – never having had “shared a wall” with anybody - but I _definitely_ didn’t need such a graphic demonstration.)  
  
That’s another thing. Stop doing that. That whole “time-control” thing. It gives us cramps, or, alternatively, makes us dizzy as hell. Pack it in. Please. And whilst I have your attention – the watching us shower? It’s creepy. End of. Knock it the hell _off_.  
  
I’m not claiming you guys are all bad, by the way. You’ve helped me get married, (though I do have some things to say on that) have kids (ditto) and pets, and the job’s going well enough… But… some things _could_ be better. A few little changes would make things a lot easier.  
  
Just – it must be so nice to be safely removed from a situation you’re in control of. Put yourselves in our shoes – having a face-to-face conversation you’re not in control of but knowing you’re well within arm’s reach is terrifying. Even if it doesn’t turn physical (and you know it has in the past…) having to stand there and look people in the face when you’ve just said something incredibly stupid or tone-deaf to the situation is… excruciatingly embarrassing. Yeah, sure, me hiding under a duvet for twelve hours straight probably looked funny as hell to you guys, but the fact was it was the only way I could think of to NOT have to be around anyone else for the rest of the day.  
  
I’m so glad I’m not alone anymore. You’ve given me a family, for which I’m so unbelievably grateful, but it hasn’t been plain sailing. It’s hard sometimes, having your actions being controlled by others, especially by others that don’t have to face the music later, but it’s a million times worse standing by and watching it happen to those you love. (By all means keep fucking with them over the road though. That’s bloody hilarious, sometimes. Just promise you’ll get me the hell away before Bob starts swinging his fists around. He’s bigger than me. And don’t tell Dab I told you that, there’s enough lovesick teen drama going on under my roof already, we don’t need more.)  
  
Speaking of the kids, they seem to be doing well. Again, not easy, Tabs and I would appreciate a bit more homework time, we can let the chores slide, but if you ever cut us loose it’d be a relief to know they’d be OK making their own way in the world.  
  
Similarly, a little bit of help with discipline would go a long way – Dab’s always been a good kid, but ever since we had a sit down with both kids and fully explained our situation, Dalien seems to have taken it as carte blanche to do whatever the hell his idiot brain tells him to do. I blame his mother, personally, but he blames you guys for **everything**. Even the things I doubt you’d _ever_ do, (and it’s hard to tell sometimes) but I’m fairly certain you’d never tell him to tie a rope round poor Nuki’s chest and “make him fly.” Poor dog was cowering under the couch whenever he was around for weeks afterwards. Tabitha was **not** amused.  
  
So… can you please at least _try_ and help us keep him on the straight and narrow? Thanks. Maybe home-schooling though, for now at least. I’m not sure I trust him to stay disguised out of the house, and we haven’t yet worked out the full extent of his “powers,” so… yeah. Please? For all our sakes? I’m not sure I want to have to explain if he gets found out.  
  
When it comes to Dab, I’m glad you’re looking out for him so much, and being more careful with him than you ever were with me. I mean, it’ll be hard forever being linked with Bob and Eliza, they fucking _hate_ us (that’s **you** and **me** us, for clarification) so I don’t think they’re happy about our sons being so close, but, from what Dab tells us, or, rather, what we can tell (he is a teenager, after all) it’s going well, and they’re happy together. Dab’s a worrier though, so… be careful. Please. And step in if they start giving him a hard time. I **know** how Evan came to be, we had Eliza pitching a fit in our lounge when she found out she was expecting, _I know it was you._ I don’t know _how_ you do it, but I know you _can_ , so if they turn on Dab, **_fix it._** That’s all I ask. Let them be _happy_.  
  
Finally - Lay off Tabitha. She’s an incredible woman for putting up with us, (yup, that you and me us again) and to be honest, she deserves better. She had better, for fucks sake, so… yeah. Lay off her, alright? I think it’s cute how she’s still so playful, and I’m so, so relieved she seems genuinely happy these days. You don’t know what it was like, when she first came along. You don’t. At least, I hope you don’t. She was **_married_**. Like, she already had a happy life before you got her mixed up with me. Literally. And yes, I liked her, and we got on, but… that’s when I realised just how messed up this whole “not being in control” thing truly was. It was awful. I felt like a monster, at first, and I think we both felt sick with guilt… It’s better now though. At least, I **hope** it is. She tells me so, and I **have** to believe that.  
  
I don’t ever want to meet her ex though. Not _ever_ , you hear me? Good.  
  
I hope you’re having a good time whilst you’re gone. It’s been a while since we’ve seen you. And I hope you understand why I wanted to get this stuff off my chest – I hope you get to read it, and that you think about it, please don’t be annoyed/upset. It’s important to us. All of us.  
  
Til next time,  
  
Dil.  
  
p.s. You’ll note how I haven’t mentioned the roof. Because we. Don’t. Mention. The. Roof. **Ever**. Only thing I will say is that at least we’ll never get lost. You can see that thing all the way from San Myshuno.


	2. Chapter 2

Are. You. Fucking. _KIDDING_. Me?!!  
  
What are you... Why would you...?!  
  
I hate you guys.

**Author's Note:**

> 3 for 3 bay-bee! Whoop!! :D Week of Fics challenge going okay so far! The title, (I'm somewhat reliably informed) means "From The Desk Of Dil" - I'm hoping that's true. ;O)
> 
> I'm aware this is a bit weird. *Shrug* - It's inspired by [From Squall With Love](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1845536/1/) which is a FFVIII fic that I recommend if you've played FFVIII. Full of spoilers, obvs, but... Yeah.
> 
> Hope you liked it, it's an idea I've been toying with writing for a long-ass time... Glad I finally got it out of my system. :D 
> 
> Let me know what you thought, either in comments here, or on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/DryCerealThief) or [Tumblr](https://drycerealthief.tumblr.com)
> 
> See you tomorrow hopefully! It'll be an actual Phan-fic, promise! :D <3


End file.
